Learn to be still

What a busy few days, Olivia is delicate, deliberate and such a soulful little person. As A mother my heart aches for her and I long to know her story. In the few days we have had her we have learned a great deal but for now we are her story and she will slowly begin to find where she f its in our family. We are all letting her settle in on her own terms, she is 4.5 years old and has developed definite likes and dislikes during her time at the orphanage. The Yangzhou orphanage was absolutely beautiful and very peaceful, quite different from our last experience. Our visit with Olivia went well,  she did not hesitate to go to the nannies nor did she hesitate to return to us. She is such a brave little girl and in her own time I am certain she will be a energetic, care free child. She loves David and goes to him if he is around. She is very, very thoughtful and is the most delicate child I have ever met. Olivia will teach us to learn to be still. Everyday she shows a little more of herself and becomes more accepting of the boisterous family she has fallen into. Cate is sweet and kind to her, yet at the same time she brings out a component of Cate we have never seen. It is not jealousy or competition it is almost as though Cate is trying to communicate to Olivia to let go, put the top down, feel the wind in your hair. I can hear Cate saying in an adult voice " hey these people look different and sometimes it's crazy but jump in big sister because it's been a great ride and you will be loved." A long time ago when I had Wyatt and his personality started to appear it dawned on me that I had very little to do with who he was, I naively thought that Wyatt would be a mini version of John David, that it was me who shaped and molded these little people. It was at that point I wanted dozen children. Life moved on and here we are in a hotel in China with 2 teenagers, a toddler and a little girl who is stronger than any person I know. David asked me one of those "if I would of questions last night." The girls were ready for bed and between us and he said if "I would have told you 10 years ago we'd be in China with 4 kids in July of 2015, what would you have to say to that." My response was "I'm tired." I am tired, but not because of exhaustion, I am tired because we are away from home and all that we have that makes us feel comfortable each day. I am tired because this is an exhausting process and there is one more in our bed. One more to love and one more who counts, one more who has a voice and one more who will teach us so many things. We are forever grateful to everyone who held us up through the process and grateful for the those who knocked us down, because somewhere in between is the place where you find peace and discover that God will provide and guide you live in the light of Christ. She is here and she is a gift that we are still unwrapping. It is through the strength you muster to leap off the ledge that makes you catch your breath for those "single" moments that make your life complete.

We have found out very little information except that she was about one week old and found by the doors of a bus stop. 

July 6th - Family Day

The journey started days ago and has been packed with planes, trains and automobiles. There has been little time to blog and as many times as I have wanted to attempt, it has been too late, too tired or simply too much. Traveling with Cate has been a totally different experience for everyone. Cate has been very adaptable along the way, she is excited to see and do and loves to be on the move. John David and Wyatt are GWT's, (David's acronym for Great World Travelers). 

We started in Salt Lake City on June 26 and travelled to Marin County to meet up with David. The timing did not work out as we had planned so many adjustments along the way had the family starting out at a later date than expected. We spent a few days in Marin and readied for the trip to China with last minute shopping and preparation. We then flew to Seattle and had a quick visit with David's family, John and Mitzie were visiting Robin and Greg already so it was a nice stop with a lovely dinner and then morning departure for Seattle airport. 

We landed in Shanghai and hit the ground running. Shanghai has so much to see, a beautiful city and we hired a guide to take us out to some other cities including Suzhou and the ancient water town of ZhouZhuang, places that were "must sees." Shanghai is definitely on the list for a revisit. 

Today is a life changing day for Olivia, as she is being readied to meet her forever family and we pray her heart has been opened by God to know that she will be loved. 

Please keep us in your heart and prayers. We will post pics and catch up as soon as we catch our breath. 

Lifesong Matching Grant

Dear friends and family,

Over the Memorial Day weekend we went to Moab for a school camp trip.  We were leaving for 3 days and I was a little worried that being out of touch we might miss an important phone call, a notification from our agency or China. I knew that there was little chance of any significant movement in the USA, but China was still up and running and I was a little apprehensive about leaving for the desert.  While driving, we stopped for gas and I ran in to use the restroom, David gave me a quick hug and off I went with Cate in tow. When we returned he said he was headed in to grab a drink, but he had something to tell me when he returned. I assumed it was not earth shattering news. IMAGINE THIS !!!!!!!

Here we are at a gas station in the middle of nowhere, and he had received a call that will truly make a difference in our journey to Olivia. The news was that we had been selected for a matching grant of $2500 from Lifesong for Orphans.  For every dollar contributed by our friends, our family, and our community, Lifesong will match the donation up to $2500.

Just four families were accepted this period and we feel blessed, humbled and very, very grateful for this opportunity. Lifesong is an amazing organization advocating and providing adoption grants and free funding loans for orphans around the world.  This will grant will enable us to use less credit, loans, and borrowing from other sources, as we near the end of the process.

Instructions for Tax Deductible Giving

There are several options for giving as outlined below. Lifesong is a is a 501(c)3 tax exempt organization, allowing your entire donation to be fully tax-deductible. Lifesong has been blessed with a partnership that underwrites all U.S. administrative and fund raising costs (TMG Foundation and other partners). That means 100% of your donation will go directly to Olivia’s adoption.

One option is to click on the PayPal button on the right navigation bar. You will be redirected to our LifeSong Family #5288 account. Family name is Mohr

Second, you can give online. Simply go to www.lifesongfororphans.org/give/donate. Select “Give to an Adoptive Family.” Complete the online form and fill in “Family Account #5288 and “Family Name, Mohr” fields

Third, to give by personal check Please make checks payable to “Lifesong for Orphans." In the memo line note family account # 5288 and family name “Mohr” to ensure it goes to the correct account. Please mail to

Lifesong for Orphans

P.O. Box 40

Gridley, IL

61744

In following with the IRS guidelines, your donation is to the named non-profit organization. The organization retains full discretion over its use and intends to honor the donor’s suggested use. Individual donations of $250 or more will receive a tax-deductible receipt. Receipts for donations under $250 will gladly be sent upon request from the donor.

The high cost of adoption is unfortunately the number one reason that so families decide not to adopt. We did not pursue any financial assistance or grants during Cate's adoption because we felt there were so many families with greater needs than ours.  We are so very fortunate and we were able to make some adjustments, have David fly a lot of overtime, and borrow from our retirement.  The truth is adoption is very expensive, there are no ways to save or cut corners, the cost is is written in stone.  We had no plans to adopt again, but when we were presented with another little girl in need of a family, though we certainly could not afford the cost, we felt called to proceed and trusted that we would solve the finances along the way.  With Olivia joining our family so soon after Cate, we find ourselves in the very humbling position of asking for help, a position that is uncomfortable, but one we found necessary as we navigated the financial obstacles we faced and applied for some grants.

Once again, David and I were reminded that God has placed adoption in our hearts and He will help provide.  St. Augustine said, "God will provide the wind but man must raise the sail".

With our sail up, we humbly ask you first and foremost, to pray for little Olivia's heart, that she may be prepared for the difficult transition of leaving behind everything she has known for 4 and 1/2 years, and joining us, her new family on the other side of the world. in a new place, with a new language, and new culture.

Second, we ask that you prayerfully consider contributing to this matching grant at Lifesong, that will help us complete Olivia's adoption.  Even the smallest gift will help enable us to reach the total and realize the full benefit of this grant from Lifesong.

Thank you for investing in the life of a child who will no longer be an orphan through your support of this adoption journey. Your investment will have an an eternal return for Olivia. We will continue blogging about our journey to Olivia Yurui Grace Mohr.  Please pray with us that this adoption will glorify God and enrich Olivia's life.

 Below are two photos, one is our referral photo and the other is from two weeks ago

The first is Yu Rui (soon Olivia) holding a sign that is to be posted so that she can be placed on an adoption advocacy site, she is 4.5 years old and she considered an older child in the adoption world, one of the many, many children that due to her age is far less likely to be adopted.  This is the photo we were given when she was referred to us:

This is Olivia 10 days ago when she met our agency director and she was told she has a family that is coming for her.  We were able to send a family photo album to her via our director. I am told that while the kids don't truly grasp the concept of having their own family, the children know that getting the  photo album delivered is a "good"  thing, lots of clapping and hugging. The director said the children were especially excited because this time around she had a large number of albums and that it was also a day when children adopted a week earlier came for a visit with their new families. Notice that Olivia's hair is being let to grow, some say it is another sign she has a family coming. 

Her name is Olivia

The clock to TA ( travel approval from China ) is is countdown mode, but the U.S State Department National Visa Center was experiencing IT glitch. We have been instructed to keep trying and trying to access a form where we apply for a visa that will be issued in China. While it is easy to get frustrated, ultimately it is really in the hands of God, his timing not ours. The outage has affected people all over the country not just us,  China's Vice Council has given the go ahead to proceed to the next step, but it  is still to be determined what will happen if the IT issue is not fixed within the timeframe need for the next step to become valid. Adoption is full of steps and forms and while some sail smoothly others get lost like a sock in the washing machine. In the instance of the missing sock it's really simple, you just wait until you figuratively find it stuck to the back of a towel in the linen closet. When adoption comes to a screeching halt you dig deep, get creative while being determined to get the momentum going. David wrote letter, I called the Visa center 42 times only to hear forty one times that they were too busy call back later.... click. David filled out a release of records, went to the State Capitol and was able to get a investigation started within our congressional system. Well we found our sock on the 13th of May.  I believe there were about 6 people who were able to get into the National Visa Center and access the form. Needless to say we were excited and felt very blessed. No as Article 5 waits to be picked we are again are inching our way towards travel approval and our family day.

Cate had her first sleepover last week and while not the slumber party kind she was truly ready to go with her Ayi (Aunt) Colleen. It was great to see the growth in her and the willingness to go. I am often reminded that our friendship is priceless. Feeling blessed, such a close friend who has been through the good the bad and the ugly. Just last weekend while driving with John David (yes he's driving ) up to Park City, he was reminiscing about his childhood and lovingly recalled the times  Colleen has stepped in and taken my place for him and Wyatt. When I worked few winters in Park City there were days of last minute appointments or inclement weather making me wait or inch my way over the pass. I would come home to find that Coll had already picked them up, made dinner and readied them for the next day. John David said those were "good" days that got better when Colleen picked them up and got them home. He said he remembers missing me, but not like the really sad missing someone, and that being with Colleen made him feel better.

We went on our first family of five camping trip and made some new connections with families that we had not spent time with. I got a little under the  weather from a winding car ride to Dead Horse Point after taking medication on a empty stomach. Cate had a blast and David was very helpful and took over the camp cooking. I am pretty sure the boys had a gray weekend , we only saw them when they needed food.

Here are  new picturea of Olivia, middle name to be determined.

Wyatt on the campout

Wyatt, with Noah B. and Nick L.

Ready to hit the road to Moab

First campout, first camp chair and first juice box

Making friends with the big kids

John David, David and Cate near Dead Horse Point

Selfie at Dead Horse Point

Cate on her first carousel ride

Blessing to all. Waiting to bring our girl home, praying for her heart and transition daily. 

We Wait

There are many roads to adoption. Most are full of bumps and potholes, beautiful scenery, days with the top down and the wind in your hair. The emotions are all over the map. Various colors of push pins strategically placed from point "A" to point "B". Weeks  of clarity, bouts of self doubt. The moment your heart, your  head and your partner say 'yes' is one for the books, the internal struggle is a game of tug of war and the internal dialogue is often bipolar. Sometimes, the process feels like  the road trip between Dustin Hoffman and Tom Cruise in Rainman. The drive itself is comical, heart wrenching, aggravating, pensive and at many times over whelming.

You feel like your existence and future is in the hands of others, sometimes alienated from the process because you have no control.  Their are moments where you feel like it's time to back out and moments when you long for your child, yet you have never met. Sometimes you talk out loud and sometimes you keep it all to yourself.


A couple of days ago Wyatt asked me if we could afford this adoption and I said "no not really but we will find a way". It brought me back to a time when we had little money and pizza night was a big deal, or the year David and I lived on Lipton French Onion soup and tuna sandwiches. You get creative and find a way to make it all happen. To this day our anniversary dinner is just the two of us, french onion soup and a tuna sandwich. It's a reminder of where we have been, where we are going and the knowledge that through thick and thin we will always get there.

This adoption road has been different, yet the same. As we inch towards travel our travel date and we hear China calling us back, we begin to dream instead of worry about this little girl our daughter who has delight in her eyes

Here are two clips of Cate that are too cute not to share. For now I will dream for the two little girls who will be sisters in a short time, save the worry for the teenage years....

   

We are proud to announce One more Mohr

How do I put into sum up the last 10 months ? So many moments both tender and trying. Time flies by and everyday our girl plays the game of catch up for time lost in the orphanage. She is trying so hard to talk, working on so many new skills and figuring things out.  Cate who is an explorer, a lover and most of all a Daddy's girl. Cate calls David, "Home"-  sweetest compliment for a man who through hard work, faith and determination brought a little girl named, Zi Xuan "home forever." We will never know why, the boys always call him "Dad" and I call him "David", so where does it come from? Maybe it's because  he travels for work, so maybe one too many "Daddy's home" or is it out of love or the quiet whispers in her ear. David telling her she is home, safe and will always have a family. a home with a dog, cat, brothers, food and lots of love. David is "Home" and although Cate is not able to express why, I think it simplifies so many things, she is home, love is home, home is happy, home is reliable and most of all home is where the heart is.


Last September we were given a chance to look at the file of another little girl, Yu Rui. She would be a big sister to Cate since she is 4.5 years old. We struggled with the decision and prayed to find an answer. She has spent her entire life in the same orphanage and initially we had very little information on her, in the initial picture we received she looked so sad . Her file, unlike Cate's was just one page. We talked it over for quite awhile and although it is sometimes difficult to be adding one more to our family, it means there is one less child without a family. We have been blessed to see her blossom with new pictures and video smiling and happy.  Someone within our agency once commented about her giant smile  and that she "was just holding out on us"

Here she is - I will blog and post more photos later this week. Over the moon in love.